LION can’t go one issue without offending someone

LION+editor+updates+letter+to+the+editor+count+as+readers+become+more+sensitive+%28Valdes%2FLION%29.

LION editor updates letter to the editor count as readers become more sensitive (Valdes/LION).

Pilar Valdes, Art director

The LION Newspaper has recieved backlash for promoting beastiality after publishing a Pet of the Month with an editor’s rate that said “I would give anything to cuddle with you” about a snake (Mr. Slithersworth). This comes after a slew of complaints since the beginning of the year, LION advisor Jackson Snails said. The community is becoming increasingly sensitive to topics published in the LION, and the publication has been receiving more and more backlash.

“It just seems like no matter what we publish, someone gets offended,” Snails said. “The kids and I just really don’t know what to do.”

In response to this backlash, the newspaper has recently begun giving classes to explain what the difference between a news and opinions piece is, as readers have frequently submitted letters to the editor, thinking that what was printed in the opinions section was being presented as fact and that what was being printed in the news section was being presented as opinion. But these efforts have not been enough.

“I know the sections are labelled at the top of the page,” critic of the LION and president of the MALUMA (Moms Against LION’s Ulterior Motives Association), Canic Themanager said. “But, it is clear that these teenagers are trying to spread their alt right socialist views onto the impressionable young minds of our children. Just last week, my son came home talking about the results of the recent IL Youth Survey, and the article he read in the LION about it. The LION is advertising drinking, and alcohol only leads to worse things, next thing I know my son will be doing flakka in Florida during spring break, all because of the LION’s propaganda.”

After multiple complaints, journalism students have decided to reduce the page count to only include the Page 7 grid and a letters to the editor section, which is normally about three pages worth of content. The lack of pages or any real content has caused a lack of productivity in the LION room.

“I feel like I’m across the hall in TAB,” LION’s editor-and-chief Faith DeCoconuts said. “I don’t do any work.”