If you’re asking yourself, would my costume get me canceled? it’s probably time for you to change. Because what’s scarier than Fright Fest and that one neighbor who got way too excited when they saw fake blood on sale, is the underlying racism, sexism, and Colonialism disguised in Halloween costumes. 

I know you might be rolling your eyes and wondering if this is what your uncle was talking about last Thanksgiving when he muttered the words “woke mind virus” but just hear me out. If you have any interest in bettering society and making sure you don’t get canceled, here are three things you can do to scare the negative qualities out of Halloween. 

First, discourage costumes that appropriate cultures. If your best bro from Indian Head Park shows up in a fake poncho, sombrero, macracas, and cigar costume he bought on Amazon for $29.99, tell him that’s no bueno. Not only is it a disrespectful stereotype, it drives all the bonita women away. Not to mention profiting off of others’ heritage and culture. Amazon took an entire culture and decided hey maybe I should condense their heritage, passions, struggles, strengths, and hopes into 29 dollars and 99 cents with free shipping. Cultures are not for sale. Peoples’ identities are not for sale. 

Secondly, do not sexualize jobs. First responders are the unfortunate victims of this—espically female first responders. Why does it have to be a sexy cop, not just a cop? Female officers do not dress like that. They protect, and serve, traversing dangerous and sometimes fatal situations. Objectifying women in high powered jobs perpetuates the patriarchal ideas of repression: women are seen not heard, women aren’t capable of high-quality work, women are weak, small, submissive. Do you think you could pull off an arrest with those six inch heels? 

Thirdly, educate yourself and others. What’s worse than a costume you have to explain to other people? A costume you can’t explain to other people. The only way we solve systematic issues is understanding where we went wrong in the first place. Why are Native Americans called Indians? Columbus thought he landed in India. He was very wrong. Hawaiian women did not and do not wear coconut bras and grass skirts. (Seriously, you think that’s practical?) That’s an objectifying Western stereotype slapped on their culture to belittle and berate women–especially since Queen Liliʻuokalani declined to give up her Hawaiian throne to a bunch of angry white men who demanded it. 

And that insanely skimpy oh my gosh if you sneeze you’re going straight to jail Kimono was perfected for centuries, worn with pride, symbolizing strength, power, and money. Dating back to the Heian Dynasty (794-1185), Kimonos are the ultimate labor of love and can take years to make: color, style, design, and even thread are specifically designed for each individual. Over 1,231 years, millions of styles, thousands of miles, and you’re wearing a knock off to get 20 likes on Instagram? 

Oppression isn’t doing a very good job of hiding behind fake costumes and it’s time we unmask this beast. Stop selling yourself and your society short. You (yes, you) have the power to chip away at racism, sexism and Colonialism because cultural appropriation is just flat out mean. So tell your friend to put down the fake cigar and fluffy handcuffs and pull up ChatGTP’s research engine. Do it for Queen Liliʻuokalani, Emperor Kanmu, our local first responders and do it because it’s the right and respectful thing to do.