After camping outside of the storefront in sub-zero April conditions, Kate Spade ‘16 and Coco Chanel ‘16 were ready to conquer Pears Prom Boutique.

“I went to the hotel while my mom stayed in the tent all night and held my spot,” Chanel said. “I got some cray snaps from her at like 3 a.m. of some other mom attacking her in the tent, haha, I screenshotted it and put it on twitter. Pears retweeted me! And no, I don’t feel bad for my mom. I needed the beauty sleep for today, obviously.”

Spade and Chanel have been bitter rivals ever since they posted a promposal picture on Instagram at the exact same time.

“She’s just trying to outdo my sparkle,” Spade said. “I’m going to show her. Pears has had training seminars every Wednesday for the past year on how to find the perfect dress under perfect conditions. I did sculpt yoga last night. I’m ready.”

Once Spade and Chanel arrived to Pears, they saw ambulances lined up across the parking lot ready to cart girls who will get hurt off to the hospital. Spade was wearing bedazzled kneepads and Chanel sported pink body chest armor. The countdown clock at the top of the store window showed that there was only 15 minutes left until the games began.

“Kate put your hair in a bun so girls won’t grab it,” Lillian Spade said.

“You too, Coco,” Lynn Chanel chided.

After both girls were ready to enter they were handed a release form waiving all responsibility from Pears Boutique. Both girls signed it hurriedly and listened to the directions given on the speaker among a crowd of girls already starting to elbow one another.

The rules went as followed: no biting, no eating, no drinking, no hitting, two girls who will attend the same school under no circumstances may buy the same dress, and you would be given precisely 55 minutes to try on every dress possible in a room without mirrors then model to everyone in the store. Photography of any kind was prohibited and phones were confiscated as each girl entered the store. If you did not follow these strict guidelines, you would be ejected from the store and your perfect dress would be gone forever.

“3…2…1,” The speaker boomed. And the girls were off.

Chanel and Spade went to opposite sides of the store ripping priceless dresses off of their pearl crested hangers. Screaming at the top of their lungs for their mothers to carry them and reserve a spot in line for the dressing room. Once they had each found the perfect amount of dresses they began to try them on.

“I look hot in everything,” Chanel sighed. Unable to make the decision she called in for reinforcements. Suddenly a flock of girls came and surrounded her, gushing over every dress. Finally she had come out in the dress. One girl fainted; another started crying just at the sight of her. Chanel knew she had pulled it off. She was going to say yes to the dress.

“This one,” she glared at her mother who quickly complied and got a sales clerk to check her out.

“Quickly!” Chanel screamed. She knew Spade could be trying on the same dress as well.

When the clerk smiled and said just about done, her face dropped. Looking at the screen then back at her, she called in to have a bodyguard stand in between them. She had informed Chanel that Spade had just walked out in her dress.

Chanel saw Spade crossing the parking lot through the window. Without a moment of hesitation, Chanel sprinted across the store in her four-inch heels and crashed through the window, reaching the parking lot she tackled Spade to the ground.

Both girls left in one of the many ambulances provided. It is still uncertain whether or not either will make a full recovery.